What They Won’t Tell You about Being a Special Needs Parent – shared from:
A little bit of everything. A whole lot of something.
Imagine yourself sitting in front of a doctor, being told the percentage of negative risk to your child’s future medical health (children if you have multiples). Terminology floats around your head as you try to put it into perspective. Diagnosis, disability, death, you’re told about these with varying degrees of sensitivity to your feelings.
You might come to a decision at the time, or you may wait until consulting any number of family and friends. In some cases, the decision is made for you, and that can provide an unspoken relief alongside the grief.
Most likely, at that moment, the doctors won’t tell you that not only do you risk the unknown life of your child, but also the existing relationships within which you find yourself. It is unrealistic to expect anyone to know exactly how they will be as a parent before a child is born. Parents of premature children cannot imagine what they will be like as parents, particularly when they don’t know *how* different their child will be (or not). Divorce among the parents of premature babies and children with disabilities or “special needs” is not uncommon.
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